Crazy T'auri Holiday Traditions
by Rikki Rray
Summary: Xander volunteers Dawn to explain about holiday tradition's to the SGC's resident alien's. TTH holiday Fic-a-thon response '07. For KaylaShay.


Crazy T'auri Holiday Traditions

I originally posted this on TTH dec '07, and decided today to post it here.

I own nothing, BTVS is Joss Whedon's baby, and SG-1 belongs to others who I can never remember. Spoiler's are post Chosen for Buffy, and maybe season 9 for SG-1, I'm sorta winging it there, cos I still haven't watched that one yet.

Holiday Fic-a-thon for KaylaShay

Dawn bounced around her office in the archaeology/linguistics department of the SGC, not quite able to believe what she'd been roped into, when Sam Carter walked in.

"Hey Dawn, you ready for this?" she asked, smirking wildly.

"Not really," Dawn grimaced. "I don't understand how I got lumbered with it, when it was Xander's big mouth in the first place that mentioned it."

Sam just laughed unsympathetically, "yeah, I know, and as usual, he manages to escape the fallout. C'mon, let's get this over with."

"Once more into the breach, dear friend," grumbled Dawn, grabbing Sam by the arm, ignoring her squawk of protest, and dragged her down the hall, along for the ride.

When Sam and Dawn arrived at one of the smaller briefing rooms, they were surprised to find a rather subdued looking Xander sitting there, along with a madly grinning Cam Mitchell.

"Colonel Mitchell, I'm surprised to see you here," ventured Dawn. "I know you know all about Christmas traditions."

"Oh yeah, but I'm not missing this for all the tea in China," he said with a grin, and then he jerked his thumb at Xander. "And since Harris here put you up for this. Well, me and Jackson thought he should help you out as well."

Dawn burst out laughing at that. "God pays debts without money, Xan," she said at the sour look on his face. "You can be my assistant for today," she added generously.

"Oh joy," he said, with a look of sheer terror on his face, knowing that Vala Mal Doran was going to be there as well.

Just then, Teal'c walked in, followed by a bemused looking Vala Mal Doran. "Dawn, what is this all about? Why are we here?" she asked as Nyan walked in, followed by Ry'ac. All of them, to a certain degree, looking slightly confused.

"We're going to explain about holiday holiday traditions, most specifically, Western hemisphere holiday traditions. You live and work on this planet, so we thought we'd explain a few of our traditions to you," Dawn said, standing up.

"Does this include that strange one about kissing underneath a a strange plant?" rumbled Teal'c.

"Yeah," laughed Dawn, "that's called mistletoe, and it's traditionally hung in doorways."

Vala perked up hearing about this. "Do you have some with you?" she asked looking mischievous.

"Yeah, I do," Dawn replied, knowing that Vala was up to something, but for the life of her, not knowing what. "Just remember that its poisonous, and aside of that, I don't wanna know," she added as Vala started to grin.

The next hour or so flew past as Dawn explained about Western holiday traditions. "Now I'm going to demonstrate, since Vala here was so interested," she said smirking wickedly. Then she handed a sprig of mistletoe to Vala, "hold this over Xander's head for me, will ya?" Vala just started to snigger silently at that, as did Cam.

"Oh, Xander," Dawn purred, bending over in front of Xander. As Xander opened his eye, Dawn laid one on him, and Sam walked in through the door with a tray full of drinks, and burst out laughing.

"T'auri traditions are really strange, father," Ry'ac observed to Teal'c, who merely raised an eyebrow in response.

"Oh I dunno," Vala said with a smirk on her face. "I think I could get to like this one," and she looked straight at Cam, who went white, put down his mug of hot chocolate that Sam had given to him, and ran out of the door.

Over the next week, Vala proved to be a menace with the little sprig of mistletoe that she'd 'liberated' from Dawn. She ambushed Daniel Jackson before he had had a chance to realise that she was even there, and Cam was walking on eggshells to avoid her. She even managed to get Teal'c, much to the amusement of Ry'ac.

But the best, as far as Vala was concerned, was still to come. Dawn and Xander's friend, Faith, was visiting for the holiday season. And Vala had been given permission to leave the Mountain. With her sprig of mistletoe. By that time, General Landry just wanted her out of his hair for at least an hour or two.

By the time that the three of them reached airport at Denver, Vala was nearly bouncing off the walls in eagerness at meeting this friend of Dawn and Xander's, she'd heard so much about her. Xander on the other hand was kinda dreading it, at least when it came to the mischief that they would perpetuate on him. He was looking forward to what they was gonna do to Cam. He owed him one for what Dawn had done to him in the holiday briefing.

"There she is!" Dawn shouted, and shot across the waiting area to Faith, and grabbed the dark haired Slayer in a hug.

"Hey D, how ya doin'? Lookin' good. Where's Boytoy?" Faith said, as she returned the hug with genuine emotion, pleased to see the younger girl.

"He's behind me somewhere. We brought a friend with us, Vala Mal Doran. She's dying to meet you," Dawn said with a massive grin on her face.

"Wicked, let's go find 'em, and get some coffee, and book," Faith suggested, picking up her bags from where she'd dropped them.

Xander spent the next week in a state of perpetual terror, as far as Dawn was concerned, this was his just desserts for lumbering her with the task of explaining about holiday traditions to a bunch of aliens, most of whom couldn't give a toss in the first place. Vala and Faith hit off in a way that was too damn scary to be believed.

After a week, Xander had had enough, misery loves company and all that jazz. He invited Cam round for a beer or three, but he decided to be a little bit sneaky. And not tell him that Vala was staying with them, or what Faith was like either.

"Harris, I come bearing beer," Cam said with a grin, as Xander opened the door, Xander stepped back to allow him. Cam never said anything. Most of the base knew about Dawn and Xander's strange little habit of never actually verbally inviting anyone inside, and just accepted it, and them at face value.

"Cool, the ladies are at the Mall, I can't stand the thought of shopping with another Summer's woman. So I stayed here," shuddered Xander in remembered horror at previous shopping trips into hell.

"Yeah, been there man. Younger sister," Cam shared, as he sat down and got the beer out. Several hours, and many beers later, Dawn, Faith and Vala returned from the Mall, laden down from their many purchases, and having had a real blast, when they saw Cam and Xander watching the TV, and shooting the breeze.

"Yo, Boytoy! Who's the FlyBoy?" Faith asked as she sauntered into the room.

"Hello Faith," Xander said, eye barely moving from the TV. "Faith, Cam. Cam, Faith. Introductions done. Beers about somewhere. Where's Vala?"

"Dunno Boytoy, said something about mistletoe," Faith said with a smirk, which turned into a full out belly laugh as Cam sat up rapidly, and Xander sunk down lower into his chair.

"Oh Christ," Cam groaned, "I'm too drunk to deal with that."

Faith just grinned, knowing exactly what Vala was up to, and it wasn't what the boys were thinking.

After a five minute argument about what to watch on the DVD player, which Dawn won, the house had settled down to a certain degree, when Vala decided to start playing with her sprig of mistletoe again.

But this time, she decided to entertain the boys. Her target was Dawn. She gave the mistletoe to Faith, who snuck up behind Dawn, and dangled it above her head, and then Vala swooped down on her, and really planted one on her.

Xander and Cam's jaw's dropped as they watched Vala kiss the breath out of Dawn as Faith laughed her head off behind them.

"Damn Boytoy! That's hot!" she said, as she leered at Cam. "I think I'm gonna have to go and play in the snow. You OK, D?" she asked as Vala ended the kiss on a smug note.

Dawn just meeped and went bright red, as red as Willow's hair had ever been, and dashed from the room as Faith continued to laugh. Vala sat down looking smug, as Xander looked vacantly at her, nearly drooling, and Cam wasn't much better.

"Like the show did we boys?" Vala asked smugly, as she sat down and helped herself to a beer. Dawn came back into the room, and took the mistletoe off of Faith, and threw it in the bin.

"I think that's enough of that now," she said, her blush starting to subside. "I think you've got everyone at the SGC with it now."

At that, everyone started too laugh.


End file.
